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FreeSpace Watch
| Well, this
being the first rant thingie and all, I'd like to take
this opportunity to introduce you to what could
potentially be the most irritating and stupid thing
you've ever read (which is the idea...). This is where I
will spew forth all sorts of nonsense, in no particular
order, of course, and the first paragraph will usually
let you know where I will try to go with it, although I
will hardly stay on topic, but sometimes I will try, I
swear! Anyway, before I really get started, I'd like to
quote IceFire on something: "It's a rant for god
sakes...not as formal as an editorial..." Well, with
those inspirational words from the man himself, I'll
start it off... |
| What's with all these arguments I've been
seeing lately everywhere I go?? I go on PXO, or to a
forum, or even sometimes on the FDL or FUDL...people
argue argue argue! Well, you're old buddy Wild's gonna
teach you how to end an argument quickly, you may not
win...but at least you won't have to suffer through
losing the argument. Now, this is a bit complicated, so
through hyper-technological advances, we will do a little
role-playing. |
| IceFire: You're wrong! Gowron: Are you arguing with me?
IceFire: What?...Well,
maybe.
Gowron: Do you want me
to take off my pants?
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| Now, that last line is CRUCIAL, 99% of
arguments won't go any further than this point. You may
get called names, but you will throw the arguer off guard
and will immediately end the argument having the arguer
forgetting what the argument was about in the first
place...its been tested vigorously, and it works 99% of
the time...the other 1%...well...the arguer is obviously
a moron and you wouldn't have won the argument whether
you had proven beyond a doubt that you were
right...people are dumb like that. |
| Speaking of dumb people...I notice some
people have problems unsubscribing to the FDL or
FUDL...they manage to do it wrong even though at the
bottom of EVERY SINGLE MESSAGE, it tells you exactly how
to unsubscribe...its not that hard...really, I swear!!
And then everyone on said lists gets mad and starts
bitching and moaning when someone else will try and
reason with said bitcher and moaner and claim its not
that big of a deal, when the bitcher and moaner claims
he's 13 years old and smarter than most of the people on
the list. You should be able to see where this is going
by now...The Smart Claiming(tm) then causes someone to
get upset then turning the whole ordeal into yet another
argument, which in turn never ends. This is a prime
example of when to use The Argument Killing
Statement(tm). |
| Somehow this just got into my head, but
where are the woman FreeSpace players?! I thought I ran
into one the other day on PXO, someone named
"Jenny," but it turned out to be one of those
"online drag queens" and after a brief
questioning on whether he was a woman or not...he
endlessly followed me around PXO where ever I went, he
managed to find me...I was scared at that point and
forced to flee PXO, crying like a little girl. BTW, if
there are any women that do play FreeSpace, please email me so I can make you famous as being one of
the few, the proud, female FreeSpace players. |
| I'd like to take this opportunity to
publicly announce that I am a smart ass!! If you didn't
already notice this, it is now in the open. I would
prefer if you took this to heart and I hope that you are
able to tell the difference of when I am serious and when
I am joking. Quick quiz: Was I being serious in this
paragraph? (yes or no) If you answered no, I think its
high time you learned the difference. If you answered
yes, congratulations, you should consider yourself
intelligent enough to handle even the most odd
situations. |
| OK, now I am really annoyed...I am just
adding this portion here...as it portrays a major
relevance to the FreeSpace community, I hope EVERYONE
will learn from this. People, you can't just quit when
you run out of respawns, not only does it not increase
your stats, but you're hurting the host as well, maybe
he's trying to pick up stats, and every time he plays
with someone, who must suck, and they run out of
respawns, so they quit...bam! No more stats for you!!!!
Its really bad when the host is out of respawns, so he
says, ok everyone, let me know when you're ready to go,
and when the guy (the only other player) runs out of
respawns, he quits, leaving the host already dead, only
enemy ships left...and the host wondering why the hell
the guy would just quit like that when you already said
we're ready to go when you are. I think its time to set
up some courtesy rules for PXO, and people, please please
take these to heart, on PXO, you're not just affecting
yourself, you're affecting everyone around you as well.
Let's begin. |
 THE MAIN BIG RULE!! Do not drop on the other
players!! How can you expect to gain rank/stats or expect
others to gain rank/stats when you constantly drop on
them at the last minute. When you are a host, DO NOT
DROP!!! People soon begin to realize that you are an ass
of a host and you will begin to wonder why only newbies
who don't know you will only join your games. That's when
its time for a major overhaul of your PXO courtesy. Also,
do not drop right at the end of the game when you are the
only person left...c'mon, that is just pure stupidity!
Its really frustrating to the other players in the game
(or player) when the only other guy quits not letting the
others pick up their due rewards, this makes PXO an
unfriendly place to play! |
| Do not cuss. Mild cussing like those used in
the main campaign, etc. (i.e. Damn, Hell) may be OK, if
used in the right situation, but more...fierce cussing
can really offend someone making them never want to
return to PXO, again!! Please, keep the naughtiness to a
minimum. This would also be a good chance to throw in:
Don't make names that are also offensive, Hellraiser or
something is fine...but don't get out of control with the
offensive stuff... |
| When yer sitting there looking at that pretty
launch button right before the game, always be sure to
make sure everyone's ready...don't "jump" on
someone, not cool dude... |
| Don't harass people, they probably don't
enjoy it much more than you enjoy it. If they are being
offensive, ask them to stop politely, or you stoop down
to their level. If they don't stop...well...I guess
you're essentially screwed. *Idea!* If PXO begins to pick
up a huge running, and lots of people are on at once, we
need something like an administrator system, where cool
people can run around and make sure everyone is in line.
They should also have mild power to stop the madness if
necessary by giving them the ability to have an account
suspended for a short time...although, the way PXO is
now, a system such as this isn't really necessary, I
rarely see more than 20 people on at once, which brings
me to my next idea, which I can't discuss right now, but
it will be cool, just like me... |
| Don't sit there and call for people to join
your game repeatedly, this hasn't become much of a
problem, but lets completely avoid it...don't criticize
people for not playing and only chatting...it's a social
place, let it be as it is. |
| Play to win, don't shoot the other players so
they can't win, especially in a coop game!! This is just
not cool and should be considered cheating. Play
friendly, play for fun...Be nice to the other players, I
would hope that they're there for the very same reason as
you, to have fun playing something we all enjoy. Don't
gripe because he "stole your kill," its not
possible to steal a kill, if you play well enough, you
will get your due rewards...that's the way it works.
Playing friendly also means duke it out 'till the end,
don't drop when you spawn out (yay! New word!), its
considered bad karma (sp?) and noone will like you
anymore... |
| When you're the host, think of it as if you
were hosting a party, you want your guests to have an
enjoyable time, you essentially want them to stay around
for as long as possible and come back when they have the
chance. Do what everyone else wants to do, if you've
already played one game, time to switch, unless everyone
wants another crack at the same setup. |
| When you are a guest, think of it as you were
a guest at someone's party. You don't want to ruin the
fun for everyone else...You should not demand that
everyone do this or everyone do that, if they're doing
something and you will absolutely not do it, go find
another game, the host is doing fine, we can't please
everyone, y'know? |
| Well, I hope everyone who reads those
takes them to heart, and realizes that they are important
for us all to have fun on PXO. I may take those, modify
or add or whatever and make them into a "Courtesy
Code" document or something sometime, so feel free
to send any suggestions. |
| Well, thus concludes the very first Wild's
Warped Rant. As always, I will gladly accept any
intelligently written email at this address here. I'm also considering taking some of the
more intelligent (or maybe just something I can poke fun
at) email and posting it right under this paragraph and
making a little reply to it myself...kinda like a letter
to the webmaster section I suppose, only it's a letter to
the crazy boy... |
The views
and opinions expressed on this page are those of the
writer only, they are not the opinions of FreeSpace
Watch or its affiliates...their views are much
loonier...
Also,
please do not steal me ideas, as they are my personal
brainstorming experiences, and those don't happen often
and I have to take what I can get...except for the
administration thing, because if it gets implemented
later, then I really don't care who claims to have come
up with it, as Volition will have to be the implementors.
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